Understanding Imposter Syndrome and Learning to Trust Yourself

Imposter Syndrome and CEOs

A common theme I hear among leaders, especially senior leaders, is: “Imposter Syndrome.”  Believe it.

I talk to leaders all over the world. I teach leaders at one of the top business schools. I work with incredibly smart, capable and successful CEOs. And, a common topic is leaders telling me that any day now, they think they’re going to be found out for the ‘fraud’ that they believe they are (and by ‘fraud’, I mean they are telling me that feel they don’t know what they are doing, they don’t have all the answers they think they need to have, they often feel they are the least smart person in the room, etc.).

In the world of leadership, this is called “Imposter Syndrome”. You might be saying to yourself right now; “Yep, I have that!” I have thought that of myself too before.

Are you really an imposter?

Let’s explore it for a moment. Every single new role you take on in your career comes with a learning curve. Even when you change companies and have the same role, there is a learning curve. Yes, even the best CEOs on the planet go through it. Those that say they don’t, will lie about other things too.

Have you sat in a room of supposedly ‘smart’ people (you know, the ones that use words you have never heard before and talk in a business language that might as well be a foreign language) and you have this really cool idea that comes to you but… you hold the idea in. Then some brainiac across the table blurts your exact idea and everyone in the room says: “Wow! That is a great idea!”  Well yep, that has happened to me as well.

Here’s the thing…. you are good at what you do. In fact, it is your hard work, strengths, wisdom and hopefully emotional intelligence that got you the role. Start trusting yourself!

Here’s what’s going on:

1. The brainiacs in the room. They have been there longer than you and they are ‘comfortable’ in their role. Or – most likely – they are suffering from imposter syndrome too and they are compensating by wanting to show everyone else that they are the smartest person in the room so they use big words and jargon. Chances are they are lonely people that curl up in the fetal position at night because they had a tough childhood where they did not get the love they needed from their parents. Be kind to them. Be safe and secure in the knowledge that you are confident enough to not need to be the smartest person in the room.
2. A’s hire A+’s and B’s hire C’s. Leaders with high levels of emotional intelligence hire people that are smarter than they are.  Leaders with low or no levels of EQ, hire people just like them or are incompetent so that they look smarter. Interestingly, the person that told me this saying years ago was the worst leader I have ever worked with and they consistently hired people that spent all their time kissing her… [you know what]. I have prided myself with hiring incredible talent people and have never felt that I had to be smarter than them.
3. Be vulnerable. The best leaders in the room are the ones that will often say: “I don’t know, what do you think?” You do not have to have all the answers. Your job is to facilitate greatness from your team and the people around you. The smartest person in the room is often that one that asks the best questions. And here is the side benefit of vulnerability… when you show vulnerability to others, psychologically, they will trust you more. It is a paradox, but true. Vulnerability kicks in a human condition where others want to help, which builds trust.
4. Self-talk. Our conscious brain is only capable of one thought at a time. What is your self-talk saying? If you are telling yourself negative things, stop! Switch up the movie in your mind to positive self-reaffirming thoughts!
5. Trust yourself. If you have an idea, get it out on the table. If it is a dumb idea, who cares. Edison had over a thousand dumb ideas before he came up with the light bulb. No one thought he was a fraud (well, except maybe Tesla).

Robert Murray is a Vancouver, BC based Business Strategy Consultant, #1 Best Selling Author, International Keynote Speaker, and TEC Top Speaker of the Year for 2018. For further advice, insight and inspiration on how to unlock your inner leader, connect with Robert on LinkedIn.

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